I recently had someone unfriend* me on Facebook. I didn’t expect it at all. Even though I didn’t want to have a romantic connection with this person, I’d hoped they could remain my friend. Evidently that was too much for this person, and that’s okay – their choice – and I respect that. I can’t say if the tables were turned that I wouldn’t have done the same thing. Still, it was a surprise and I have lost a friend – someone I thought was a real friend, in real life – not just virtual life.
This led me to start thinking about friends and the ones I do have in my life. I have friends who I’ve known nearly all my life. One friend I’ve known since I was 13. She lives in New Zealand now, but we were best friends and nearly inseparable as teenagers. We can go years without talking to each other, but when we do, there’s a connection, a bond, that’s unbreakable.
Then I have friends who I’ve known only a few years, and the bond is just as strong. I feel like they are a kindred spirit to me and I’d do anything for them, and know that in any situation they would be there for me also.
Then there are the social friends – those you know casually. Those who pass through your life for a brief time to help you through something – perhaps a tragedy, or a phase in your life where you need them or they need you for whatever reason.
I’ve been thinking about friendship a lot lately. What is a friend and what makes some friends able to stand by you no matter what and vice versa. It’s nothing I have an answer to – just something I’ve been thinking about since I was unfriended this time. Today, a friend – one of those who I bonded with the moment we met – sent me this passage in email today, and I thought it was rather interesting. There are some threads of truth to this, although I’m not sure I agree with all aspects of what it says.
*unfriend – the common term for someone deleting you from their list of friends on Facebook.com
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty,
to provide you with guidance and support,
To aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
This person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled,
and their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has
Come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons,
Things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson,
Love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other
Relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
{ 1 comment }
Oh, how I miss all of my old friends that I lost touch with before the days of the internet. I hear you on this post and really enjoyed it.
I have friends like your New Zealand girl, and it’s so nice when you can just pick off where you left off.
Not having a car really sucks and presents a huge challenge for me these days in my friend relationships, so I am thankful for some contact with them online. Not to mention all of the people I met thru my blog!
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